Monday, March 4, 2013

Today my realtor saw me naked and i pointed a 357 at him.

Sorry if your a realtor, but the ones that come to show my house can kiss it. They always call and want to show it when its the least convenient for you, I somehow always make it work. But when they show up a half hour before they are supposed to be at your house and just walk in without knocking, i want to shoot and i almost did today!

I was in the shower about 40 minutes before the realtor was supposed to arrive and all of a sudden i hear talking, adult talking. I always shower with the door open when MFKL isn't here so the boys can come tell me if somethings on fire or whatever. The realtor just lets himself in 40 minutes before the time he is supposed to be here, and its not our regular realtor either. Surely he was told there were people living in the house. Not only did he just walk in but he walks in with some people to show the house to them.

So i hear men talking in or near my kitchen when i am in the shower, several things start running through my mind in a split second. Instictually, i jump out and run to my bedroom and check the boys room, but there not there so naturally, i get the 357 from my room and just start walking to the other end of the house as fast as i could, trying to get to my boys. I cannot tell you how freaked out and scared i was. We recently had a man try to break into the house in the middle of night, this was like 2 weeks ago. Luckily i was awake and scared him, and then woke up MFKL who grabbed the pistol and ran outside in his underwear looking for the guy.

But back to the realtor. I was almost to the men's voices and my kids. Naked, dripping wet i turned the corner with the 357 drawn.....The realtor almost shit himself, the other guy is standing there smiling. I suddenly relieze the situation and yell at the kids to get in my bedroom, i calmly tell the realtor to get the fuck out of my house and try to walk out of the room as quickly as i could trying to keep a little dignity.

After i get dressed who knocks on the door? The FUCKING REALTOR! Oh. My. God. If i was in his shoes in this situation i would have totally never came back to the house again. I open the door, shocked and pissed off. He actually still wanted to show the house, he said the guy was still interested in seeing the rest. The rest of what i asked? My ass or the house? The poor guy didn't know what to say and just turned and walked away.

I am still mad, and feeling guilty. Just a little. I'm pretty sure this was the first time the guy had a gun pulled on him, and I'm pretty sure i was the first naked women to be standing in front of him. He was obviously a gay man and the guy he was showing the house to was obviously not. I almost feel like i should send him a 'sorry, i pulled a gun on you and showed you my gunt' card.


  1. OH NO! Well good work for not shooting him. That's quite rude.I'd be writing a strongly worded letter to the company if it were me! It happened to my housemate once many years ago too. NO gun though... Thanks for hooking up on the HUmp Day Hook Up

    1. I thought about writing a letter but i don't think he will make that mistake again. Thank you, love the hump day hook up, lots of great bloggers!

  2. That is freakin hysterical! And good for you! I am guessing he'll never make that mistake again!